If there is one thing I’ve learnt from this camp, it is that God will answer you, but in His own time and we have to be patient. Before the camp, I had my doubts whether to stay on in G2 due to certain reasons. These conflicting thoughts of staying or leaving made me really confused at times, and I was not sure which way I wanted to choose. Therefore, I decided to pray, asking God to make the decision for me. Well, the truth to be told; I prayed and prayed…but there was still no indication. I guess, after a while, I stopped asking God altogether.

Before the camp, I was in Bangkok for a sport exchange trip. When I came back, I was feeling really tired so I pushed the thought of going to the camp out of my head. The next morning, I received a friendly sms from none other than Darren. He asked me to give him a call once I reached Singapore. ‘Thanks Darren’, I thought dryly when I read the sms. Somehow or rather Darren must have known I was not going to reply him because the next moment, my handphone started to ring. It was my cousin, Jeremy, calling. He asked if I wanted to join them for the camp.

A simple question like this really put me in the spot. I started feeling guilty that I was not going to the camp, so in order to salvage whatever conscience I had left I told him I might join the rest the next day. Later in the night, another message from Darren asking when I was coming down.

This time, I stopped to think. Could this be God’s way of answering me? Maybe it is, I thought. Shrugging my shoulders I thought, why not? Just go for the camp and see how it turns out.
And I was so glad I did.
When I arrived at the FMM Retreat house, no one was there as they were all at the Botanical Gardens. That gave me some time to think, I just hoped that I would find out by the end of the camp what I really want.
Anyway, when they returned from the Botanical Gardens, they were pleasantly surprised to see me. They just smiled and said how happy they were to see me here and jokingly scolded me for not being there earlier. There was no cold shoulder, nothing, just warmth.

Before dinner, we had a small little jingle-cum-prayer. I thought it was quite amusing. It was something like this: (to the tune of “The Adams Family”)
“We thank you Lord for giving
The food we are receiving
For friends, fun and family
We thank you, Lord. Amen.”
Dinner was surprisingly quite good, I ate in silence listening to them discussing about the events in the Botanic Gardens, about their disgust of having to fish out objects from a box of worms and crickets. I chuckled at the thought my friends’ faces when they had to do it and inwardly I was thankful that I came later. Anyway, when Jeremy Bek and Daphne realized I was the only one exempted from that experience…(Riiight…so much for that thought of having escaped )well as you can guess. So the box was brought in front of me,(by the way, the whole box stinks really bad ). Just to give a brief description, the inside of the box was disgusting, moist and wriggly. Haha, I remembered it took such a long time trying to get that plastic thing out. Oh well, I did in the end and my whole hand smelled the rest of the night.

After dinner, there was a short session discussing about the events in the Botanic Gardens, a few bible readings and writing a short letter to God. Then, we trooped down to the training shed and sat in the circle. It was affirmation time. Honestly, before the camp, I never liked affirmation sessions. Maybe, I never knew who to affirm and found it a little awkward at times. While I scanned around the circle, thinking of who to affirm, all of a sudden, there were so many names that came flooding into my head. I was actually surprised how smoothly my affirmation of others went. The affirmation was really a heartwarming experience, everyone just poured out what they felt about one another and thanked them, for being who they were and just the way they were. I guess, it was this part of the session that showed me the inner side of G2 and I unconsciously became very much attached to this choir.

Most people stayed up just to write affirmation notes to one another, which was quite touching, as Daphne put it. For the camp, my letter box was this small envelope which, I thought at the beginning of the camp, was quite appropriate. That was because I thought that I would not get that many letters from G2. Boy, how wrong I was. When I checked it the next morning, my poor letter box was choked up with letters and a sweet.(Thanks guys! I really appreciate your letters and the sweet)Had a great time reading the letters! On the last day, we had mass. Guess who came to celebrate the mass with us? He was none other than Father Val! It was really nice of him to come down to our camp. Anyway, I thought that the mass was really good. Maybe, it was our mass and it was a good ending to the camp.

I am really happy that I came down to the camp; it really unblocked whatever awkwardness I previously felt between G2 and myself. Now, I can say that I am comfortable with G2 and it is great to be back singing, joking and having fun together with them. My only wish now, is just to be able to help out in G2 in any way I can. I cannot thank you guys enough for helping me feel at home in G2 and supporting me.
Finally, a big thank you again to everyone, you have made this camp really special for me. =)

-clara-
G2 Retreat’05